Sunday, November 05, 2006

Occasionally and in passing, friends will tell me about game job anouncements they saw somewhere-or-other. They curse and shake their heads, and then make casual reference to my extensive theoretical work on game job ads that, well, suck.

This all goes to show, of course, that I am right. I do not needlessly exaggerate. Game job ads that suck are out there, cropping up almost daily to blight the game industry landscape. Far from being the stuff of mere hyperbolic fantasy of my own creation, suckful game job ads are very, very, real.

Until now I have refrained from naming names and shaming the guilty, out of respect for my professional future. Now that I am convinced that I have no such future, I boldly lay these niceties aside. Let us ponder this recent game job ad posted three days ago:

Yet Another Game Job Ad That Sucks

Please go and read it. It is veritably riddled with Game Job Ads That Suck pecadillos. Can you work out what they are?

Allow me to remind you of:

The "Fantastic Opportunity to Downsize Your Career" job ad

Veteran project managers, why not spend another 5 years of your career in the associate producer typing pool?


The "Must Have 10 Years' Experience, a PhD, and a Post-graduate Diploma in No-brainer Software" job ad

Must know Word and Excel? I'm trembling like a leaf.

All those wasted nights on software engineering project management theory and praxis - and to think I've had Microsoft Office tooltips disabled all this time... Clippy, will you ever forgive me? Oh the shame, the crying, crying shame!

And all this cheerily rounded off at the end with veiled-threat-to-take-out-a-restraining-order style pleasanteries. How nice it is to see the cutting-edge game industry finally freeing itself from such outmoded "old economy" conventions as courtesy and good manners.

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At 1:08 am, Blogger Patrick said...

You have a very refreshing attitude. The way I recruited people was by getting to know them through blogging, e-mail convesations, all that, over a period of time. I've had some trouble recruiting artists lately because there wasn't that nothing-on-the-table incubation period, but creative collusion saw me through eventually.

At 12:18 am, Blogger Patrick said...

Hey, would you give me feedback on this ad?

Word verification: keygekbk

At 3:28 pm, Blogger Kipper said...

I think it was a very honest ad, and people appreciate that.
The bit about prefering a female artist grabbed attention, which was good.
You gave a lot of information. I think it's always better to err on the side of more rather than less, because any air of mystery in a job ad is very irritating.
The tone of the ad gives the impression that you are down-to-earth and reasonable person, rather than a pompous illiterate wanker, and which is always a good sign in a potential employer.

At 8:12 am, Blogger Foozwah said...

Ah, as one of those "escapee from the games industry" types, it's good to read job ads like those occasionally.

They serve as a very effective reminder of just how much happier I am not being part of that world.

At 2:53 pm, Blogger Kipper said...

Even so, the legend of Uncle Fuzzy lives on the Australian game industry!

At 3:17 am, Blogger the rantolotl said...

Is this anything like Fuzzy Spart?

At 2:42 am, Blogger Foozwah said...

kipper: Aww shucks, kind of you to say so! (Though I suspect these days it may primarily be known as a cautionary tale!)

rantolotl: Err, since Im not sure what that means, I'm going to go out on a limb and say "no"!

At 3:02 am, Blogger Kipper said...

Foozwah: are you going to go along to the Beam exhibition at ACMI? i think it opens on the 13th of December or something

I'm considering going along in disguise!

At 11:51 pm, Blogger Foozwah said...

I'm curious as to what will actually be shown there, so I'll probably stick my head in at some stage, even if only to have a semi-bitter, semi-nostalgic laugh. ;-)

(Not sure when it opens - just had a quick look on the ACMI site and there was no Beam-type love to be had, aside from a reference in David G' bio, from something back in April.)

A disguise is a fine idea! I might dress as my favourite root vegetable, or possibly Archduke Ferdinand...


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