Wednesday, June 27, 2007

I have concocted a scheme for feeding myself in Paris. This is the advertisement that my friend Xavier has offered to circulate:

Neo-Zelandaise, résidante à Paris, offre la conversation Anglaise en échange d'être invitée pour déjeuner chez n’importe quel resto à Paris. Le qualité et la type du resto correspondraient au niveau de la conversation.

Je m’appelle Katharine et voici mon adresse email :

Pour ceux qui lisent Anglais, c’est mieux expliqué ici :

My name is Katharine, I’m living in Paris and I am offering English conversation in exchange for… lunch(!)

And as a former radio talkback host, I am proficient in both talking and listening.

In exchange I ask only to be invited to lunch at café or restaurant. But what kind of lunch, you ask? Well, where we go is entirely up to you. Your decision about the quality and type of lunch we have will reflect the subject matter and level of conversation you require.

For example, if it is to be take-away sushi in the park, we will perhaps discuss your WoW guild and I will teach you how to swear proficiently in English;
over a cous-cous we could discuss the national question in Palestine;
a pleasant bistro might have us thinking through current software development practices;
a rather nice restaurant would enlarge the vocabulary considerably, and feature philosophical topics with excruciatingly pretentious academic banter;
a Michelin-starred restaurant? The world is your oyster, as it were.

(If you take me to Quick, however, I must warn you that my conversation will be extremely obscene and filled with expletives joined together with the grammar of a 12 year old child. But if that’s precisely what you require, then why not?)

So there you are. Lunch for conversation.


At 5:33 am, Blogger The Rantolotl said...

Having been an unwitting recipient of Kath's food for conversation scheme, I can honestly say I wholeheartedly endorse this product and/or service.

She will provide memorable conversation, and is almost guaranteed to complete with hat, or at the very least an interesting story on where she last lost it.

At 5:35 am, Anonymous Fandango Jones said...

Is there a betting pool for the ratio of legitimatly interested parties to seedy old men thinking this is a subtlely advertised prostitution service yet?

I wager $20... wait, no. I wager a hearty pub lunch that the seedy old men win out 10:1.

At 12:04 pm, Anonymous cj said...

What will a nice home cooked meal get me next time you're back in Melbourne?

At 12:42 pm, Blogger Kipper said...

I trust my friend counts few seedy old men among his acquaintance.

If not, over a home-cooked Melbourne meal I suppose I could recount my newly found experience narrowly avoiding the clutches of seedy old French men.


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